2015

So, 2016 is just around the corner.

Frankly, this year has been tough, at least compared to last year. I kind of enjoyed 2014 as my new life began to start, I got my internship in a very reputable company that I had been dreaming of, got chances to fulfill my wanderlust, got my bucket list crossed off, grades were satisfying, made new good friends. Life was just easy, at that time.

I went through a major heartbreak this year that I never thought it would be this painful. A heartbreak which left me unstable, powerless enough to get myself back on the track. But yes I know, people would say a heartbreak is a part of life we all have experienced, or will experience. I know, I truly know as it's not my first time and being optimistic as what instagram-worthy phrases say is so cliche. Truth is, I'm quite afraid of emotional closeness because I know once I'm into it, I'd throw myself wholeheartedly that would, somehow, backfire on me and that's what happened. My mornings were blurry and breathing was hard, but I knew I was just going to be fine.

At the same time, someone from the past came back into my life and I came into conclusion that I'm not ready to be close to or to be with someone again, at least, for now. Well, I know everything happens for a reason and let the reason speaks out later. Let me know later that it was all worth it.

Enough for the cheesy peasy. At last, I'm getting used to listen to my Ólafur Arnalds' playlists again.

I finished my internship at E.ON successfully and later this year got invited to a professional training (got a sweet bouquet from the team on my last day!:') and went back home to Indonesia a week after. I spent 1,5 month at home, felt unreal yet I couldn't hide my happiness seeing everyone I had been missing for a long time.

In June, I finally did my solo travel again to Croatia and blessed to have found a stranger who became a good friend (we're still exchanging messages up until now, even though she's back in the US)

And finally, I'm getting closer to graduation. I'm working on my master's thesis and grateful to be involved in such a big European Union project from my department.

People come and go, but I know my comfort circles stay forever.

Long story short, this might not be my favorite year but there I learned one thing: to keep those who are worth fighting for and to let go those who aren't worth keeping around.

Yet, I'm excited to see where life's gonna take me after this. Going back home for good sounds like a plan, but my heart says I still have to wander somewhere else,

to find and to be found.