Dear daughter, yes, your mom does solo travel

Dear Rinjani,

I just got back from my solo travel to Croatia. Yes, I do solo travel if you're wondering. It's been long time since the last time I did my solo travel. I remember that time when I just booked my flight from Jakarta to Kinabalu then few days later, I received my Letter of Acceptance from the university I'm studying at now. I changed my mind and canceled my flight, I've never been to Kinabalu since then.

I was about to read my Sputnik Sweetheart when a girl came to me asking for a seat beside me on the bus with familiar English accent.

"She's not German." I murmured

Our almost-7-hours journey from Munich to Zagreb wasn't boring at all as we talked a lot of things. She's from Montreal and she's younger than me but our wanderlust seemed to connect us in a fun flowing conversation. You know, I'm always into that kind of conversation. 

We spent few hours in Zagreb together checking off those must-visit-places in the city (thanks to her Lonely Planet), strolling around the downtown, having pancakes, and so on. Later on the night she invited me to go out for a drink but I decided to stay at my hostel as I had to catch my bus very early in the morning.

The next day, I had a fun trekking time at the Plitvice National Park. Yes, another check off of my bucket list. I almost expected to see those fairies coming out from the lakes, flying above the canopy and waterfalls. I could write here all beautiful things I've seen there, but no, you have to prove it by yourself someday. I'm lucky enough to have been there.

There are many routes you can choose there depends on what you really wanna see (and how comfortable you are walking on the long hilly pathways), I chose the longest one and walked along the way, ventured off the trail (but still safe, trust me). I hiked up the hill out of the recommended routes while everyone was too busy taking pictures and I'm glad I did as the view up there was stunning with less crowd.

R, don't put off your dream just because you're alone, if you feel you must go, then go, wait for no one. People might ask you tons of questions of why you do solo travel: "Aren't you lonely?", "Did you just break up with your boyfriend?" or even worse, some guys might be looking at you as if you're their next target, but don't freak out, everything will be fine. It's just because solo travel isn't for everyone.

I don't have all the reasons of why one should do solo travel. All I know, if I hadn't stopped waiting, I'd never discover the other side of myself: that I'm pretty strict on my budget, that I can do a selfie, that I can befriend with strangers, that I like observing people, that I'm not perfect, that the only person I can truly depend on is myself. 

It's a way to more appreciate what's already left behind, it's a way to appreciate home, or someone to call home. 

So, someday if you feel like it, then go, because I did.

Love,

F

but moving on is never easy

Dear R & R,

It's been quite long time since the last time I wrote letters for you. I was pretty busy preparing every single thing, I was busy dealing with my own thoughts and deep feelings.

Darling,

Right when I was 3 or 4, my father taught me how to ride a bike. The 4-wheel bike is just a thing for me at that moment, I quickly mastered it and most importantly, I felt safe. I am steady though I'm not moving. Then everything started to scare me. My father took off the two wheels on the back, my source of ease. I wasn't ready yet I had to keep it moving, I fell off my bike.
Riding a bicycle is just one of the greatest metaphors for living life. That's why I am writing this, I want you, both of you, to keep moving as you'll need it for the sake of your balance. 

Darling,

I am still far away and I can't be a faultless role model for you. But I promise I'll be the one who share endless stories of mine before your bedtime, I'll be the one who watch you riding a bike for the very first time of your life, though moving on is never easy.

See you on the other side of the world.



Love,


Me,
Few days away before my departure.

To R & R

Hello, R

You know, disturbance is inevitable, but downfall is optional. You can't expect the storm to stop, but you can expect yourself to be fine. Be a home, be the place everyone belong. Be good, be the most wonderful friend everyone ever stumbled upon --or if you can't, just stay there and be a horizon where everyone would leave their heart. Some places might become lonely and even lonelier, but you'll be tough as I know.
Be strong, that's why I gave you the name Rakata.


Hello, R

Play your role, for everyone who's trying to reach you. They may fall, they may be hurt, but please secure them with your warmth. Don't be cocky, know how to deal with your beauty. Be a friendliest friend, be a paradise in everyone's heart. Some things might be hard and even harder, but you'll be great as usual.
Be tough and splendid, that's why I gave you the name Rinjani.


To R & R,

Do not whine. Later if you have questions, find the answers by your own. I can't help you, so does your father. The only person who can do it is yourself. This is something you have to work out on your own.
But don't be scared, don't think about yourself too often, because you and you are parts of the scenery.



P.S I hope you can stand with the cold.


Warmest hug,

Me,
hours before my morning flight

Picture taken in Muara Wahau, East Borneo

Letter To Future Daughter

Dear Jani,

I woke up at 1 am yesterday and found myself under the half moon and 3 stars. It was about 3 degrees Celsius at that time, I did feel a cold shiver run throughout my body. I did not sleep at all. I walked for 1,5 hours just to catch the sunrise. You know, I'm not that strong dealing with extreme temperature and oxygen depletion. I saw the sunrise on my right side, it was splendid. My hands were frozen I can't feel my camera just to capture the moment. I'm back walked among the wilting Edelweiss, my hands were getting warmer because of the morning sunshine. You know, I found my love here though it's broken. But above all, I found myself here.

Love,

F.